REFLECTIONS

I have a confession. I want him. And I've been cheating on my
roomate to have him. I know I shouldn't, know he'll never be mine. But
sometimes at night, when she's asleep in her bed I'll get this feeling
down in my blood, this burning in my veins for the wild ride that only
he can give me.

And that's when we meet together. Always outside, always away from
others. Always in the dark of the night, as our desire is not able to
stand the harsh light of day or the logic of our true situation. I
can't have him, only borrow him for a short time. But for those
stolen minutes, that hour or two I can feel that smooth, sleek
strength in my hands. I can listen to him hum, nearly purr as I
caress him, get his fires going. The slight shiver under my fingers
as we come together, the two of us on a wild night's passionate ride.
My breath catches as we race, my heart beating faster as he takes me
further, faster than I've been with anyone else. I find myself doing
things I'd never dreamed, wild and dangerous and exhibitionistic. I'd
thought about doing it with others, but have only managed to let that
animal side of me out with but one alone, only with him. I let my
hair loose and he shakes it around, the wind swirling it up and around
my face as we speed like a wild thing towards our ultimate goal, that
most sensual showdown. I control him, yet he controls me, my delicate
touch and his ultimate power - a match made in an erotic paradise.

And to hear him get louder, his voice roaring in the night, the harder
we move, the further we go? Takes my breath away and I forget for
those moments who I am, who we are. In times like that my head spins,
the stars and lights streak by in my mind and eyes.

But all too soon it is over, our time together finished. We slip back
into the yard quietly, trying not to let our passing wake the dogs, or
her. I touch him once more, feeling his hardness, so smooth as silk
and warm as velvet. He is hot, and stays behind to cool down in the
dark as I leave him. As I make my way alone up to my room once I am already dreaming of him, and of the next time we can be together, hopefully soon.

I have a confession. I want him. Someday I'll have him again. But
for now I will simply dream of the night, and the stars, and of
driving my roomates' Grand Prix once more.